LOL

“All right everyone, the food is ready!” It was dinner time at the Stevenson's house. Mr. Stevenson had just arrived home from work while Stacy and Mark, the children, were busy with homework in their bedrooms. Mrs. Stevenson had been preparing dinner for the last half-hour. The smell of buttered mashed potatoes and roast beef filled the house. Everyone was anxious to eat for Mrs. Stevenson's cooking was exceptional.

One could call the Stevensons an ordinary, American family. Mr. Stevenson worked as a car salesman, Mrs. Stevenson worked part time at the local credit union and the children both attended the the town's public high school. It was the usual custom of the Stevensons to have dinner together as a family. During this time the family would discuss the day's events: test scores, car sales, local current events, and other topics that involved each member of the family. However, ever since the Stevensons signed up for a nationwide family plan, which included unlimited texting, conversation became less vocal, and family interaction lessened.

Once everyone was ready to eat, Mr. Stevenson asked Mark to perform grace. After Mark was through, the family began to fill their plates one after another, each taking their turn and each patiently awaiting the other. Mark then turned on the T.V. while Stacy turned the radio to her favorite station. Mr. Stevenson took the time to look over his e-mails and Mrs. Stevenson updated her face-book profile.

“How do your progress reports look like, kids?” asked Mrs. Stevenson.

“IDK, my teacher didn't give me it yet.” replied Mark.

“Straight A's momma!” responded Stacy. “Dinner is great by the way.”

“Yeah, good job on the potatoes mom.” complimented Mark. “Btw, what do you call this new stuff?”

“What are you talking about? Describe it to me.” answered Mrs. Stevenson.

“It looks like a bunch of little eye balls in a pudding mix.” said Mark

“Haha! Those are tapioca pearls” said Mrs. Stevenson.

“They're not bad.” said Mark.

“Thx kids, glad ya liked it.” said Mrs. Stevenson. “Honey, you get that promotion you were working for?”

“Still working on it.” said Mr. Stevenson.

“My friend showed me this funny video on youtube today. Search: Bed Intruder Song.” said Stacy.

Each family member stopped eating for a while to watch the video. Once it was over, laughter could be heard around the house.

“Funny!” exclaimed Mr. Stevenson.

“LOL!” commented Mark.

“Good one!” said Mrs. Stevenson.

There was no audible conversation heard among the house. An occasional laugh or gasp were the only sounds that could be heard beside the radio and television. The seemingly empty house continued to carry the empty, eerie sound when suddenly, there was a knock at the door. Because it wasn't heard by any of the family members, the person who was at the door, who happened to be Grandpa Stevenson, let himself in the house. As he entered the house, he noticed that there was no one at the dinner table. There were pots and pans on the stove half-filled with food but there were no set places at the table. Grandpa heard the television coming from Mark's room and walked over to the bedroom door and opened it to find Mark alone sitting in front of the T.V. with his plate of food and his cell phone.

Mark, aware of his Grandpa's presence, looked up from his phone and said, “Oh, hey Grandpa.”

“Who are you texting?” asked Grandpa.

“Dad was just wondering if I had work this weekend.” replied Mark.

“Oh, is he out of town?” asked Grandpa.

“No, he's upstairs.” said Mark.

“Wait just a second. Is anyone else home?” asked Grandpa, sounding a bit frustrated.

“Yeah, everyone's here.” responded Mark.

“Did you all forget that I was supposed to come eat with you all today as a family?” asked Grandpa. At this point he was clearly upset.

“Oooohhhhh. Hey mom, Grandpa's here!” yelled Mark. Remembering that she had previously invited her father-in-law to dinner, Mrs. Stevenson hurried down the stairs to the dining area to meet Mark and Grandpa. Mr. Stevenson and Stacy arrived several seconds later. All were silent as Grandpa began to speak.

“I thought that we were supposed to have a family dinner today. It seems that you've all lost sight of the significance of this time of day. Family dinners are for each member to grow closer to one another. It is where the household pauses to take time to get to know each other on a personal intimate level. How is this possible when no one is present? Do you expect that texting each other builds strong family bonds?

“Maybe I'm not as digitally fluent as you all but I'm smart enough to know that one can't express their emotions through a phone as well as they can face to face. Or maybe that has ceased to be true in this day and age. Apparently you have all become comfortable eating dinner in separate rooms, justifying the absurd act by sharing kilobytes over a three-inch screen. How are you even supposed to pray over the meal if no one is at the table?”

“Well, actually.....” interceded Mark.

“I don't even want to hear it,” continued Grandpa “because I'm afraid to hear of what more this viral habit has done to you all. Do you all realize how rude it is to talk to two people at once? And you poor kids! How do you expect to excel at a job where customer service is required?

“I went to a restaurant the other day where a teenager took my order. I tried to be courteous and polite as possible but it was useless. It was as if an automated machine was taking my order. Personality and character have disappeared from the daily public. People have less friends because they have forgotten how to speak to people that they don't know. Society lives from task to task, objective to objective.”

“But Grandpa, how else is mom supposed to advise me of dentist appointments and other important things while I'm at school? It makes things a whole lot more convenient.” remarked Stacy.

“And that's just one more reason that cellular communication has disrupted your lives.” added Grandpa. “What ever happened to patience? Nobody appreciates the anticipation and excitement that comes from revealing intriguing news to a loved one or a close friend. Well, I won't become emotionally numbed because of texting. From this day forth I will never use a cell phone again.” And as Grandpa concluded, he took out his own cell phone and turned it off for the last time.

A numbing silence swept over the family like a cold, chilling wind. The atmosphere was quickly warmed by Stacy's soft giggle as she looked at Grandpa's face book profile on her smart phone.

“Grandpa!” she laughed “Your friend Albert says to hurry over to his house or you'll miss the season premiere of Glee!”

And now, an important safety message......